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Free Massage, Simmering and                            Back Pain Relief

How long do you want your back pain relief to last? Yes, over 80% of those who try the technique correctly get relief in 7 seconds, and the relief can be from 20% to 100%, and if you repeat it you get more, but how long will it last? For example, on a 60km bicycle ride I did it for leg cramps and got 100% relief in less than 7 seconds, but 10 minutes later I needed to do it again. So I did it 5 times and the relief was sustained for the rest of the journey.

And hey, I did it while I was pedalling gently. I didn't need to get off my bicycle. But what if you have a major issue beyond cramping and spasm (sustained cramping)? What if you need to spend some time straightening your spine, for example? You need to learn Simmering.


I cannot eat raw rhubarb. It's poisonous. It has oxalic acid, which gives me bumps on my tongue. My throat wants to close over, just as with beetroot and silver beet. Some can handle it without problems. I can't.

So I cannot drink beetroot or silver beet juice either, because my body doesn't handle oxalic acid well. But if I cook the oxalic acid out of the rhubarb, beetroot or silver beet then I can eat  it. I bring it to the boil and then simmer it for about eight minutes.

In the same way, the cause of metabolic dis-ease is toxicity. You can have toxic food (excess fats or proteins), toxic emotions (apprehension, anger, grief), toxic thoughts, toxic desires, toxic expressions (swearing rather than immediately using healing words), toxic intuitions (unfounded fears and phobias) and toxic freedoms (thinking that you can do anything because you are invincible, and jumping off a tall building). 

How do you get rid of toxicity?

You put your toxic food in the pot and simmer it. Or you put your toxic emotions, thoughts, desires, expressions, intuitions and freedoms in the pot of your mind and simmer them. Simmering is sustaining the purification process.

You simply Laugh Down, Tone Down, Call Down, Sing Down or Hum Down the message that you want to give your superconscious, unconscious, subconscious or conscious mind. Doing it downwards drops it into the pot of your mind. 

Then you simmer it. You sustain the focus of your whole mind on the message. There are a number of ways to simmer.

1 Place your palms on centre line. Place your left palm on your upper belly and your right on your lower belly to simmer your superconscious mind, to release your blocks to developing your abilities like singing, memory and coordination.

Place your left palm on your lower chest and your right on your upper belly to simmer your unconscious mind, to release old habits that hold you in past, inappropriate patterns like addictions and abusive behaviours.

Place your left palm on your upper chest and your right on your lower chest to simmer your subconscious mind, to release blocks to perception so that you can function with taste, feeling, touch, hearing and sight better. If, for example, you have anxiety about moving objects in your peripheral vision, this may cause high blood sugar. So breathe with this hand position to ease down your anxiety.

Place your left palm on your throat and your right on your upper belly to simmer your conscious mind, to release blocks to logic, reasoning and chess playing.

Always keep your left fingers closed and your right open (spread). Then drop the message into your mind ONCE ONLY, breathe with the tip of your tongue touching the air, close your eyes and relax. 

When you move your hands off centre line the Simmering stops.

2 Cross your left ankle over your right. Then drop the message into your mind ONCE ONLY, breathe with the tip of your tongue touching the air, close your eyes and relax. 

When you uncross your ankles the Simmering stops.

3 Tape a Singing Amplifier into your navel. Then drop the message into your mind ONCE ONLY, breathe with the tip of your tongue touching the air, close your eyes and relax. When you remove the Singing Angel the Simmering stops.

Short term, medium term, long term

Using your hands is convenient for short term Simmering. But when you scratch your nose the Simmering stops. So you can use it for a 10 minute massage. So when you wake up in the morning you can give yourself 10 minutes of massage. You give yourself a positive mindset for the day!

Crossing your ankles is convenient for medium term Simmering. But you need to get up and go to the toilet. So you can use it for a half hour or hour long massage.

Taping a Singing Amplifier into your navel - with the BLUE dot towards your skin - sustains the message until you remove the Angel. So you can use it for 6-8 hours a night for treating yourself to deep massage, physiotherapy, osteopathy, Seven Element Acupressure, homeopathy or other forms of natural healing. This gives you over 40 hours of those modalities for FREE for the rest of your life, once you have a Singing Angel. 

Even better, when you change it at breakfast, lunch, dinner and bedtime, you can sustain your Simmering all day long. You can maintain a positive mindset the whole day long!

You can sing better, act better, speak better, perform better, write better, remember better, coordinate better, dance better or perform any task better if you give yourself that message and Simmer it. You can improve your sporting abilities - such as batting, bowling, catching or playing tennis - better, although using a Sporting Angel usually works better for developing your Superconscious abilities. 

Right now, simply place your left palm on your upper belly and your right on your lower belly and Laugh Down on the sound of "er". Do this ONCE ONLY.


Feel how the muscles all over your body lose their pain, spasm, cramps, discomfort, ache and tension. Sustain the Simmering until you have released all of your tension. 

Laughing Monkey Massage

Do you wake up with a smile on your face? You will if you know for certain that you are about to receive an amazing massage while you lie in your bed. That's right! You can have a massage, for FREE, for the rest of your life, from the best massage practitioner in the world, if you follow the next steps.


You only get a few minutes, otherwise the download of toxins from the massage will be too much for your day to be smooth. But it will set the mental tone - your mindset - of your day to know that you are sooo loved that you can enjoy this massage - or something similar - every day, for you and your family, for FREE, for the rest of your life.

Magnetic Massage Sneak PeekCheeky Monkey
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How to Do It

Here's what you do. Make sure that you have no metal on - no bra hooks, watch, jewellery, watch or mobile phone. Place all EMF devices outside your room the night before, so that you can sleep well and so that they don't interfere with your massage the next morning - no computers, mobile phones, tablets or game machines.

Secondly, make sure that you are wearing natural clothing - not synthetic. 

Thirdly, sip 2 glasses of water beforehand.


Now for the massage proper. You cannot consciously control your body's metabolism. Your unconscious mind controls it. And your conscious mind cannot speak to your unconscious mind to control it. 


BUT your unconscious mind LOVES the sound of music. It responds to beautiful music in the distance - say, across a park - well before your conscious mind does. So you can call to your unconscious mind downwards in pitch and it will accept your suggestion. 


For example, if you call the affirmation "Neck and shoulders relax rapidly now" downwards - from high to low, loud to soft and fast to slow - it will respond for 14 breaths, which is about 2 minutes. But what if you want more than 2 minutes, which is just enough time to relax into a soothing, calming massage?


Holding your hands at centre line will sustain the Call Down until you move your hands. So prop your elbows up on a couple of cushions if you need to, place your right palm on the centre of your lower belly and your left palm on the centre of your upper belly. Spread the fingers of your right hand and close the ones of your left.  

Now Call Down, ONCE ONLY. Notice that the process of relaxation lasts for longer than 14 breaths, but once your take away your hands it stops. Then you have to wait for 14 breaths and repeat the process.

So try this. Call Down


"Foot massage now"


with your hands in position. Relax and breathe with your eyes closes and feel the relaxation that foot massage brings. 

At the end of the massage simply remove your palms from centre line get out of bed slowly, because you are coming out of a deep relaxation. And because you have released a great deal of stress during the massage, and because you feel loved, you will probably have a smile on your face for the rest of the day!

For the spiritually minded - double your effectiveness with the help of friends

You cannot teach natural health and healing without the important contribution to it that Jesus Christ made and makes. In three years of preaching he spent more time doing healing, and millions have received healing benefits through his methods since. 

Do you believe in God and Jesus Christ? If so, instead of Calling Down an affirmation, Call Down a prayer, with your hands in position on your upper and lower belly, ONCE ONLY.

"In the name of Jesus Christ

I pray for foot massage


Thank you, God. Amen."

Amazingly, when I do this, I have experienced the hands of Jesus Christ on my shoulders, to let me know that he is with me, then on my feet. He uses 1.75 pounds of pressure, whereas I normally teach 2 pound of pressure. But his effectiveness is greater than mine - and I was the third person in Australia to learn Foot Reflexology in 1976-77. 

You see, the founder of Foot Reflexology, Eunice Ingham, went to England where an Australian architect learned from her. He taught his sister, and she was in my massage class, mainly learning Swedish massage. She wanted a student to practise on and I agreed. So I learned while she practised!

Both of us went on to teach others, and now there are 10,000 practitioners in Australia who I don't know. So I know how effective each student is and how well they do their healing work. And I can honestly say that the best foot massage, including Foot Reflexology, that I have ever had was from Jesus Christ. 

So give it a try. Relax deeply into it. Even if you don't feel his hands working on you, enjoy the massage as with any other practitioner. 

At the end simply remove your palms from centre line, say "Thank you Jesus, thank you God" and get out of bed slowly, because you are coming out of a deep relaxation. And because you have released a great deal of stress during the massage, and because you feel loved, you will probably have a smile on your face for the rest of the day!

Do no more than 10 minutes per day, so that your day remains smooth and comfortable and you don't get a major Healing Breakthrough - a major detox - during the day. Usually this amount of time is enough to keep you feeling good.


Please note that during the purification process of Simmering you may experience old thoughts, feelings and emotions arising. These blocks to abilities are called "sins" or mistakes that you have made in the past, including bad attitudes.


Continue to allow God and Jesus to do the work as they dissolve. Keep breathing! Remember that God breathes through you with every breath. 

There are also sins that relate to your unconscious, subconscious and conscious mind. Again, through prayer you have opened the doors for God and Jesus to remain in you, to transform your addictions (such as gluttony, which is over eating and comes from your addiction to food) and other sins into strengths. Simply continue to breathe and they will be transformed!

John 15:4 says "Remain in me, and I will remain in you. No branch can bear fruit by itself; it must remain in the vine. Neither can you bear fruit unless you remain in me." Simmering is how you remain in God and Jesus ... or more correctly, how you can allow them to remain in you and work through you. 

When you Simmer you make a choice, not just with your Conscious Mind, which does not govern your subconscious, unconscious and superconscious minds, but with your whole mind, to remain in Jesus. Otherwise you may simply be praying consciously and not choosing to completely surrender. That's your choice. It depends, at any moment, on your commitment to God and Jesus.

The Breath of Happiness

I had 13 of my family and friends die in 13 months, and 33 in nine years. It started with my father-in-law, then my uncle, then my mother, then my friend of 30 years, then my ex-wife, and so on. It ended with my father, who I cared for during his last six months.


I knew it was going to happen like this after the third death. My Breath Testing told me. So I gave myself a Happiness Program of comedy movies, banana skins, long baths with essential oils, meditations and so on, and kept working (teaching natural health seminars).


The most effective technique was the Breath of Happiness. Sometimes just doing it I would cry buckets of tears. The most important part was not to sob on the in breath. When I did that it simply increased my load of grief.


So when I felt like sobbing I hugged myself and laughed. That got out the neediness for my mother that had been there since babyhood. Taking in grief with sound by sobbing lowers energy and can sustain chronic fatigue.


The Cleansing Breath

Sit on a chair, stool or log. Place your hands on your knees. Breathe out and bend down as far as you can comfortably go.


If you have back pain this may only be a few inches. Don't push into the pain. Otherwise you won't be happy.


My father began this way. Then, after a few days, he could bend half way down - without pain. And after another week he could bend the whole way down - without pain.


Now close your fingers on your out breath and open (spread) them on your in breath. Notice how you can bend further and breathe out more on your out breath and breathe in more on your in breath.


Now do the same with your toes.


Now do the same with your eyes.


Now do all three - fingers, toes and eyes - as you bend down on your out breath and come up on your in breath. You are doing the Cleansing Breath.


The Breath of Happiness

"Happiness dawns on the turn of the breath" says the Vigyana Bhairava Tantra, a book of 112 meditation techniques written over 5,000 years ago. So elongate the turn of the breath.


Breathe out, hold the breath out, then breathe in. Repeat - out, hold out, in, out, hold out, in, out, hold out, in - continuously. As you hold the out breath happiness dawns. Yes, you can do this silently at any time you choose (preferably not after a meal).


To activate it and get the most cleansing effect as well, laugh out in small outbursts on one, long out breath. "Ha, ha, ha, ha".


Now lengthen this to eight, short, out bursts. "Hahahaha, hahahaha". Keep building up your number of out bursts, four at a time, until you get to 28 - 7x4. Then keep going to 42. And so on.


In this way you will rejuvenate your cells the fastest by getting rid of your CO2. You see, nature abhors a vacuum. So as soon as you let go of all the CO2 from your lungs, more will want to come in from your bloodstream.


So more will want to come in to your bloodstream from your cells. You detoxify your cells themselves, not just eliminate toxins from your bowels, as you do with a colonic irrigation. That's called elimination. This is called detoxification. You need both.


Then, when you breathe in, you alkalise your bloodstream with oxygen. Notice that when you breathe in you feel like doing so from your lower belly. This is one practice that corrects and overcomes Reverse Breathing.


Tongue Positions and Sounds

Now place your tongue on the dip below your lip and laugh on the sound "air". You breathe out embarrassment and pain which you have stored in your cells for years. 

Now do the same with the other nine tongue positions, which you will find in the chart called ??????????????? which is available now FREE on this website, OR you can download it for only $1. Just press the BANANA button (COMING SOON).

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Happy Just to Hug Sneak PeekCheeky Monkey
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Your Seven Step Rejuvenation Program

Now  that you have set your mind into positive mode your body needs exercise. The best form of exercise is Laughing Down, followed by Buzzing, for the back and spine, which is the communication channel from your body to your brain. So go to the Laughing Monkey Medicine page and start Laughing Down. Press the BANANA button now.

If you are Christian or appreciate the fact that Jesus Christ spent more time healing than preaching and was and is the greatest healer the world has ever seen you can return to this list from the Drop Down Menu later on in the day to pick up further links.

Look Better, Feel Better, Sound Better Sneak PeekCheeky Monkey
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